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Nuffnang Main Page Thanks for reading (: Click on the link below to go back to my HOMEPAGE♠ Links ReadySetFall Jaimie Staciy Dom & Vanee Angele Marylynn Kit link History ✖ inspired in September 2009 ✖ inspired in October 2009 ✖ inspired in November 2009 ✖ inspired in December 2009 ✖ inspired in January 2010 ✖ inspired in February 2010 ✖ inspired in March 2010 ✖ inspired in May 2010 ✖ inspired in June 2010 ✖ inspired in July 2010 ✖ inspired in August 2010 ✖ inspired in September 2010 ✖ inspired in October 2010 ✖ inspired in November 2010 ✖ inspired in December 2010 ✖ inspired in January 2011 ✖ inspired in February 2011 ✖ inspired in March 2011 ✖ inspired in April 2011 ✖ inspired in May 2011 ✖ inspired in June 2011 ✖ inspired in July 2011 ✖ inspired in August 2011 ✖ inspired in September 2011 ✖ inspired in October 2011 ✖ inspired in November 2011 ✖ inspired in December 2011 ✖ inspired in January 2012 ✖ inspired in February 2012	Shadows. written on Thursday, December 8, 2011 at 10:18:00 PM "When you hurt people, they begin to love you less. That’s what careless words do. They make people love you a little less." —Arundhati Roy You say you love him, love him with all your heart. You beg him to take you back. You promise it won't happen again. You say it meant nothing. And because he does not know how to be without you, he concedes. You hurt him like he never expected you could, but he takes you back. You stabbed him in the heart, cut off his arteries one by one with the bluntest knife, and he takes you back. You say you are sorry, but I don't believe you. You were not sorry when he was holding your hand and with your other hand, you were texting another. You were not sorry when you told him you loved him, and with the same mouth told another how much you wanted him. You were not sorry when you lied to him, told him that guy was "just a friend" when he was, clearly, not. Where were your apologies then? Where was your conscience then? You say you are sorry, but I don't believe you. You know how much you hurt him. You see the wrong in your actions. But what you don't realise, is that it's caused much more damage that you can bear the consequences of. You know you love him and that he loves you. But the truth is, he is not sure why he does anymore. Does it break your heart to know your lover is struggling to find reasons to love you? You say you are sorry, but I don't believe you. You remember what made you fall in love with him. Beyond his looks and his crooked smile, it had been how certain he seemed to be about everything. So that when he said he loved you, you knew for sure he meant every word; it was not just for show. He made you feel loved, but after a while, he ceased making you feel wanted. You knew it was not right, but chose to keep it that way. How could you have shattered that illusion of happiness for him? You never could have. You say you are sorry, but I don't believe you. You try everyday to make amends, and they appear to work for some time. But doubt has already seeped into his mind. It's like a shadow you will never be able to catch; that you can only ignore surrounded by darkness. And when he smiles when you tell him you love only him, you know he doesn't believe you. And when he smiles when you tell him you want to spend the rest of your life with him, you know he doesn't believe you. And when he smiles when you tell him he is the only one for you, you know he doesn't believe you. Not anymore. You say you are sorry, but I don't believe you. You realise he is having a hard time getting back to his feet, and you don't know what to do because it's all your fault. He wants you to be with him, but does not want you near him. He wants you to like him, but does not want your poisonous love. He wants you to talk to him, but does not want to hear your voice. He wants you to mean your words, but not the same words you used before. And you realise how much you broke him. Him, who used to be so certain. You say you are sorry, but I don't believe you. You can see in his eyes that he wants to forgive; that he wants to be fixed; that he wants to forget. But the truth is never solace—he cannot be with you anymore. Of that, he is certain. He packs his bags to leave. The thud of his heavy suitcase on the concrete ground brings you to your knees. You cry, and you beg, and you plead. But he says the stay is not worth the pain. You say you are sorry, that you were not thinking, that it won't happen again, but you are not really sorry. Not until the day he finds someone else. Someone who takes all the broken pieces of his being, and puts them back together the way you couldn't. Not until the day he waits by the altar for his bride, knowing that once upon a time, he had wanted it to be you—with certainty, only you, forever. Not until the day it hits you that because of one stupid mistake, you lost the life you had always wanted. Not until the day it hits you that because of one stupid mistake, you lost the life that had already been yours. And then you'll say you are sorry, and I will know that you are. . . . Written a while back. I thought I would share since I have nothing to blog about. You should have figured out by now, that when I have nothing interesting to say, I dig up some silly piece of writing and pass it off as a legit blog entry. I find it hard to filter the good from the bad in my writing, because I am scared I will be biased. Some people may find this good and that bad; and other people may find this bad but that good, right? "What is good", is quite partial anyhow, is it not now? You know how opinions work. So I find myself wondering, what if I really am terrible at writing? What if I am just part of a tiny group that finds my writing "passable"? I am aware it's extremely stupid to be so doubtful of myself all the time. What I often complain about may sound very petty and baseless at times. I know people have much greater problems than that.. but these are mine, you know. *** The greatest loss is what dies inside of us while we live. write to me ♠ \| this post has 0 comment(s). Read my older posts >

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History

✖ inspired in September 2009
✖ inspired in October 2009
✖ inspired in November 2009
✖ inspired in December 2009
✖ inspired in January 2010
✖ inspired in February 2010
✖ inspired in March 2010
✖ inspired in May 2010
✖ inspired in June 2010
✖ inspired in July 2010
✖ inspired in August 2010
✖ inspired in September 2010
✖ inspired in October 2010
✖ inspired in November 2010
✖ inspired in December 2010
✖ inspired in January 2011
✖ inspired in February 2011
✖ inspired in March 2011
✖ inspired in April 2011
✖ inspired in May 2011
✖ inspired in June 2011
✖ inspired in July 2011
✖ inspired in August 2011
✖ inspired in September 2011
✖ inspired in October 2011
✖ inspired in November 2011
✖ inspired in December 2011
✖ inspired in January 2012
✖ inspired in February 2012

Shadows.
written on Thursday, December 8, 2011 at 10:18:00 PM

"When you hurt people, they begin to love you less. That’s what careless words do. They make people love you a little less."

—Arundhati Roy

You say you love him, love him with all your heart. You beg him to take you back. You promise it won't happen again. You say it meant nothing. And because he does not know how to be without you, he concedes. You hurt him like he never expected you could, but he takes you back. You stabbed him in the heart, cut off his arteries one by one with the bluntest knife, and he takes you back.